February 10, 2008 @ 5:27 p.m.
She's A Whore

I know, I know I am such a goddamned slacker.

I used to write entries every day, if not twice a day. Lord knows I have a lot to write about these days. But I just can�t be bothered to get the words down on paper (or the screen in this case).

Maybe I need a change, a new layout or a new location.

Anyways, the other day MotorMouth walks up to my desk and whispers to me, �I�m a whore.�

First of all, I really could give two shits about this fact and why she decided to pass this information along to me is a mystery but I figured I should respond in some way.

�Right, so did you finish ordering those forms we need?�

�Eeeeeevil?� she whined

�Whaaaaaahut?� I replied

�I�m a whore� she repeated.

So despite my oh so subtle hint that I didn�t want to hear it, it seemed that she wanted to elaborate further.

Long story short, the chippy passed on her virginity along to a subway conductor, the very same virginity that up until this point she has quite vocally very proud of.

Being the kind and sympathetic soul that I am I gave her this advice: �Well don�t be upset if he never calls you again�

Hehe.

My favorite thing about MotorMouth is that she never ceases to give me ample opportunities to make cracks at her. She�s young and had not yet learned the art of not leaving oneself open for my clever retorts.

Later on in the day:

MotorMouth: �Eeeeeevillllll! Look my belt broke.�

Evil: �Look, go take some rope and create a makeshift belt until you get home.

MotorMouth: runs rope through the belt loops on her jeans and makes several knots Perfect, now my pants won�t fall down�

LOL! I mean really. How could I not?

Evil: �Well good. Then maybe it will be a little harder for the next guy to get down there.�

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